Finding Inner Peace in a Stress Filled World – Part 1 – External Stress

We live in a stress filled world.  Some of that stress is internally imposed.  Some of it comes from the world around us and is externally imposed.  In this blog I will discuss those external stressors.  In my next blog I will discuss the internal stressors.

Inner peace does not deny the realities that surround us.  It just insulates us from being consumed by them.

We each experience a variety of external stressors.  There are the common every-day variety ones.  Then there are stressors that come from unanticipated events.  Furthermore, there are the long-term stressors that seem to live with us in perpetuity.

Common Stressors

These are those irritating things that we encounter on a daily basis.

  • The guy who flips you off on the freeway
  • Your teenager who is a good kid but mouths off for no apparent reason
  • Your boss who is nit-picking a project

These are all things that cause an adrenaline rush in the moment, and in that moment we feel...

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Frustrated … Overwhelmed … Or Both?

So often it feels like life is not following the script. It feels as though we are on an endless hamster wheel. We keep trying to run faster but our level of exhaustion and frustration exceeds our progress. When it feels like life is falling short of the life we want to have, that we are striving to have, that we think we deserve to have, it is only natural to feel frustrated.  We may ask why?  We may feel life is not fair.  We are desperate to change it yet feel powerless to do so.

20/20 Hindsight

How often have you looked back and said “I wish I had …..” or  “If only I had …”.  We may feel frustrated as we recognize missed opportunities. There is absolutely nothing we can do to change the past.  The best that we can hope for as a result of 20/20 hindsight is the knowledge to help us avoid those mistakes going forward.    

Our circumstances today are the result of thousands and tens of thousands of...

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Is There a Magic Bullet to Achieving Your Goals?

Why do some people consistently achieve their goals when others who seem just as committed consistently fail to achieve their goals?

Do They Set Different Goals?

Sometimes they do.  People who consistently achieve their goals have a powerful why that propels action.  People who don’t achieve their goals frequently don’t have that powerful why.  Their goals represent things they “should do” or “it would be nice to do” not things that are incredibly important to them for compelling reasons.  It really is about the choices we make when we are setting those goals.  CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE ABOUT THE POWER OF CHOICE

But What if They Set the Same Goals and Some Are Still Consistently Unsuccessful?

People who are accustomed to keeping commitments to themselves achieve goals consistently (assuming they set appropriate goals to begin with).  People who are constantly overwhelmed and in the habit of procrastinating are...

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Revolutionary Results in Accomplishing Goals

We all set goals.  We even accomplish some.  But so often, year after year we still are listing the same goals.  The fact that they appeared on last year’s list, and the year before's list, and the year before that, is demoralizing.  It’s like we’re playing whac-a- mole with our self-esteem.

Goal-Setting 101

Have clarity about what you want to accomplish.  Set a specific, measurable goal.  You want sufficient clarity that will be absolutely clear to you when it is accomplished.  Know why this matters to you.  Without a powerful why it won’t happen

Goal-Setting 201

Create specific incremental steps that will get you there.

What do you need to do in the next 90 days?

What do you need to do in the next 60 days?

What do you need to do in the next 30 days?

What do you need to do this week?

What do you need to do today?  Create an action plan for the day …. 1-3 specific actions to move yourself forward. ...

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Goals and The COVID 19 Pandemic

On January 1, 2020 did you have a list of goals for 2020.  Were you excited about the promise of a new year and a new opportunity?  Was this the year you were going to finally ……….?

I suspect that if you are like most people some of those goals were already at risk before COVID 19 changed our world in March.  For essential workers, it increased their hours, their feelings of being at risk, and their stress levels.

For others they were suddenly thrust into the role of a homeschooling teacher.  I loved the comment of one child, when asked about his teacher, replied that he really wanted a different teacher the next year (sorry mom). 

For some there was the challenge of adjusting to telecommuting, and for others it was the challenge being unemployed with nowhere to go and nothing to do.

None of these things were anticipated when we optimistically created that list on “2020 Goals”.

Reality Check #1 – Some of Those Goals...

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Making Mindful Decisions Will End Procrastination

Procrastination derails more goals and more good intentions than any other obstacle.  Yet it can be stopped with one word to a large degree,  That word is NO. But how can that be?

Use Your Unique Definition of Success to Make Mindful Decisions

When you use your unique definition of success as a mindful filter you will know when to say yes and when to say no.  If something is in alignment with your unique definition of success you say yes. If it is not in alignment with your unique definition of success you say no.

The 7 Pillars of a Happy & Successful Life  are the foundation on which your unique definition of a happy and a successful life is built.  

CLICK HERE  to learn more about The 7 Pillars of a Happy & Successful Life.

This means you will say no to good things and to good friends.  That is not a bad thing.  It is not a selfish thing.  It means that you recognize that you can make the greatest contribution to your life,...

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Is a Daily Planner Part of Your Success Plan?

Have you heard “If you fail to plan, you plan to fail?”  I have never planned to fail and yet I have many, many times.  I suspect you have too.  So how do we plan effectively to minimize failures.  Over the years I tried what felt like every planner on the planet, because I was determined to plan, yet none were right for me for more than a couple of months.  I suspect you have experienced the same thing.  

Undated Planners

The first time I came across an undated planner I knew it was a step in the right direction.  It gave me the freedom to start on a Tuesday in the middle of February or a Saturday in November.  I didn’t have to wait for Jan 1 or waste a significant portion of what I had paid for. 

Rationalization is the friend of procrastination.  Procrastination is the enemy of progress.  It shouted you have a choice to start today.  You don’t have an excuse, so start now…it was as if this...

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Overcome Feelings of Being Overwhelmed

When it feels like life is falling short of the life we want to have, that we are striving to have, that we think we deserve to have, it is only natural to feel frustrated and overwhelmed.  We feel torn in too many directions and like it is not possible to do everything on our “to do” list. We may ask why?  We may feel life is not fair.  Others seem to manage to juggle everything gracefully. We struggle to understand why they can and we can’t.

Did You Procrastinate Yesterday?

Often those feelings come as a result of yesterday’s choices.  We are overwhelmed and frustrated and filled with regret that we didn’t take advantage of an opportunity, that we procrastinated doing something that is now biting us in the butt, or hindsight is now pointing out the error of our ways.

There is absolutely nothing we can do to change the past.  Our circumstances today are the result of thousands and tens of thousands of small and large decisions...

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GPS for Accountability


In my last couple of blogs, I have talked about how GPS has to know where you are at in order to get you where you want to go.  We have looked at goals and action plans and they are certainly crucial to your GPS for life but without accountability frequently nothing happens. 

Think of this like a three legged stool.  Three legs provide for balance and stability.  When one leg is missing the stool is essentially worthless.  Having a GPS for life is exactly the same. 

You need clear goals which are driven by a personal and powerful why. You need a concrete action plan with incremental steps to get you where you want to go.  Then you need accountability to insure focus and timely progress.  When all three legs are in place in your GPS for life then there is balance and stability which creates momentum, change and accomplishment.

How Does Accountability Work?

Accountability is nothing more that the opportunity to say yes I did it, or no I...

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GPS Action Plans

We set goals.  We create to do lists.  Why do we need an action plan?  Isn’t that redundant?  No! It is the crucial missing piece that when omitted results in us spinning our wheels and keeping us from accomplishing our goals.

The Role of Goals

Goals represent the finish line.  That are explicit statements of things we want to accomplish or who we want to become.  The most effective goals are specific.  For example, instead of having a goal to save $1000.00 compare that with “I will save $1000.00 by Dec 31 of this year (6 months) by going to Starbucks once a week rather than every day.  In addition to saving money that will make my Starbucks visits feel special rather than routine.  That’s a double win I’m excited about!”  Do you see the difference?  General goals are nice but rarely achieved. 

Perhaps your goal is to write a book in the next 6 months and as nice as that is, the chances of it...

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